So, it's been a while.

Things haven't changed much since my last entry – work is still relentless but for some strange and twisted reason I don’t mind slaving away. Perhaps it's because I actually enjoy what I do and the people I work with.

It's now a little over 6 months since Mark and I got engaged. I realised that I haven’t documented how the engagement went down, but I honestly can't remember much of what happened other than that we were on top of a mountain in Japan, I was wearing big, white fluffy ear muffs and there was crying. Lots and lots of crying.

We've spent the last 6 months fielding questions from everyone of when the big date is, we didn't have an answer since we didn’t know what we were going to do. But a few weeks ago we decided that we're going to aim for March 2009, which leaves very little time to plan. Why March? A number of factors but all will be revealed in due time. (And no, I am not pregnant).

3 weeks into the planning phase and I am so over it. I am overwhelmed and just drained by it all. It is fun I guess, but given that I spend most of my day at work planning and organising, the last thing I want to do when I get home is find the energy to plan some more.

People have said to consider hiring a wedding planner, which sounds like a logical solution, but given my anal retentiveness it would probably just make things more stressful since I'd have to double check and approve all the things that are being planned by the planner. I've always been the type of person who liked doing things myself and MY WAY.

In these 3 weeks, I've discovered a few things.

1. Wedding receptions are a rip off. RIP. OFF. I can't believe how much venues expect people to pay. Given this is meant to be the most amazing day of my life, I don’t want it to signal the start of me going into financial ruin just so I can have a decent party with my loved ones. $180 for a 3 course meal and drinks? Screw that.
2. Wedding dresses all look the same. Seriously, after around 1 hour of looking through a magazine or viewing a website they all blur and just look like white, floaty piece of material with the occasional sparkly bits. It's just so traumatic trying to find the 'perfect' dress – how will I know that the dress I pick will be the one? How do I know that after I find one that I like that another one won’t come along and scream 'pick me'? Slinky, floating, pouffy, lacey, sparkly, short or long? The choices are enough to drive you mental. I can see why some people get a bad case of the crazies.
3. Guests lists aren't very nice. The politics involved about who to invite and who to 'cut' from the elusive list are a pain. Do we invite partners of gopod friends that we don't really know? Do we not invite friends to make way for family members or family acquaintances we don’t know just to appease our parents? How are you expected to have the most amazing day of your life when you don't know most of the people there?
4. Sales assistants become even pushier. I don't like SA's at the best of times, so when I go dress shopping and am forced to strip down to my undies whilst I wait for a pushy SA to force me into a gown and gush about how 'perfect' and 'gorgeous' it looks on me when I clearly can see in the mirror I look like a fatty boombalada wrapped in silk, lace and padding, I can't help but think that online shopping is the best thing invented ever. Also, I don’t appreciate comments like "Wow, that veil will make your day even more special!" – how the fuck will a veil make my day better than it already will be, given that I'm promising forever with the love of my life? I'm pretty sure a piece of netting which costs $5 to produce but has a price tag of a few hundred will not reduce my happiness or increase amount of specialness.

Like I said, am overwhelmed and drained, and can already see myself descending into the depths of a psycho Bridezilla. Perhaps when we lock down a venue for our reception and an actual date, things will be less stressful and I can actually enjoy the planning stages – bring on the cake tasting, the menu tasting, the shoe shopping and honeymoon planning. It's ok if I buy multiple pairs of shoes right? Every girl needs a backup pair...or two.